Preview:
"Prisoner of the Caucasus or the Adventures of Shurik-2017"
9th grade MBOU "Staromokshinskaya secondary school" Aksubaevsky municipal district of the Republic of Tatarstan
Speakers:
Nina, Shurik, Trinity: Experienced, Coward, Dunce, Saakhov, Caucasians, Donkey,
group of girls.
The action takes place in Nina's house.
Nina:(take a deep breath ) - Ehh, Shurik.. Now it’s winter, a magical time of year, a time when every girl wants to put on a beautiful dress.. and me? I have nowhere to go.
Shurik: Nina! ( gets up from the table)So I have a wonderful offer for you! I want to offer you to be the most beautiful Snow Maiden at the Masquerade!
Nina :-Shurik, don’t talk nonsense! Me and the Snow Maiden? Yes, there will be a lot of people there, everyone will laugh at me (sulking)
Shurik : Ninochka, no one will laugh, who would dare to laugh at such a wonderful girl! Moreover, the children there are very well-mannered.
Nina: I still won't!
Shurik :Ehh..and you haven’t even seen the Snow Maiden’s dress..(turns to the side)
(Nina's eyes sparkle)
Nina :And here is more detail!
Shurik : It’s as beautiful as winter in Russia, like your beautiful eyes! Yes, there are no Snow Maidens like you in Russia, even Santa Claus himself!!!
(Nina is embarrassed and straightens her hair)
Nina : Well, so be it, I’ll be a Snow Maiden, if you can’t do without such a beauty, but Shurik, what will we ride on, because the path is long!
Shurik: I have an EXCLUSIVE surprise about this, just a minute!( runs behind the tree)
The doorbell rings. Nina opens the door.
Nina :-Shurik, where are you going?..(Three robbers cover Nina's mouth with a rag. She faints and is dragged behind the tree)
(IN this minute Shurik runs in with a donkey)
Shurik : Look what a wonderful donkey I bought..Nina? Ninochka, where are you?!(runs away with the donkey behind the Christmas tree)
Experienced, Coward, and Dunce come onto the stage, carrying the “captive” in a bag. The bag kicks, hitting the Coward in the head.
Coward : Aw, it hurts! Wow...
Experienced :Yes, a lady with character.
Dunce :Do you think they will pay us a lot for this?
Coward: I don't know.
Experienced :I don’t know. But obviously not enough. Comrade Saakhov is a prominent bigwig in the village!
Babes: Yes, yes.
Coward : Yeah...he has a lot of money.
Experienced :What else should you “drink”! It’s too early to drink, once we finish this matter, we’ll drink horse kumiss and celebrate the New Year.
Dunce :Did someone say horse kumiss?!
Experienced : Better go, you fool!
Shurik comes out from behind the tree.
Shurik :Nina! Nina! Where are you! My dear, my dear!
Shurik sees the Coward, the Dunce and the Experienced.
Shurik : Excuse me, comrades, did you see a girl running through here? About 16 years old, brown-haired, brown eyes.
Coward: Student?
Shurik: Yes!
Experienced: Athlete?
Shurik: Yes!
Dunce: Beauty?
Shurik: Yes!
Experienced : a student who is taking the OGE in English?
Shurik: Yes!
Coward: No, we didn’t see it
Experienced : No, there wasn’t one like that here.
Dunce: No, not likely.
Shurik : It’s a pity, Nina is my best friend, I don’t know what went wrong. Suddenly she was afraid to perform and ran into the mountains, no, it’s unlikely, she’s afraid of heights. What if she didn’t like my donkey, it can’t be, because I have him so cute, right?
Goonie: Cutie.
Experienced : I have never seen more beautiful donkeys.
Coward :What's true is true.
Shurik :Excuse me, but what are you talking about?
Experienced : Well, uh...we slaughtered a fat sheep, we're taking it home for a Caucasian barbecue.
Shurik :Can you help?
Experienced: no, it’s not worth it.
Shurik: No, it’s worth it.
Experienced: not worth it.
Shurik: It’s worth it.
Experienced: Worth it! Oh.
Shurik : That's good. Let's go!
All the heroes walk around the tree 2 times, and at the entrance Shurik notices a strange movement.
Shurik :Your ram is suspiciously alive. I'll see what's wrong with him.
The crooks chorus: - No!
Shurik sees Nina and screams:Nina! What's going on here? Police, here!
Shurik is hit on the head and falls.
Experienced : Let's run away from here! Quickly, quickly!
The crooks quickly leave. After a while, Shurik comes to his senses.
Shurik: What happened to me? It seems that... exactly! Nina! Nina! They stole her! They stole Nina! What should I do now?
Caucasians come out dancing lezginka.
Shurik: Who are you?
One of the Caucasians: Caucasian police. i.e. a gang of this area. Can I help you?
Shurik :Yes! A major kidnapping just happened here!
One of the Caucasians:On whom?
Shurik: Per person!
One of the Caucasians:So do you know where they went? Perhaps there are some clues left?
Shurik : No, unfortunately we didn’t stay.
One of the Caucasians:This is bad, how can we help you?
Shurik is sad, when suddenly the donkey begins to make strange sounds. Everyone looks at the donkey. The donkey pulls Shurik towards a strange rag called a “handkerchief”
Shurik : Oh, so this is Nina’s handkerchief, I gave it to her!
One of the Caucasians: Apparently, your donkey is very smart, maybe he will show us the way to the kidnappers!
They give the donkey a handkerchief to sniff, he reaches forward.
One of the Caucasians:The donkey took the trail, forward!
Caucasians, donkey and Shurik leave the stage.
Narrator :Meanwhile, in the house of Comrade Saakhov..
Crooks enter the stage carrying a bag with Nina inside
Saakhov :Well, finally! What took so long?
Experienced : Well, you know, it’s not so easy to tie up and put a living person in a bag, especially when he fights like a boxer, both with his hands and feet! This Shurik has also become attached to us.
Saakhov :What? Shurik? How did he know?
Dunce :But he didn’t know. At least until a certain moment.
Saakhov: What idiots! You tell them, you talk, and that’s it! Okay. Nina!
He takes Nina out of the bag and removes the scarf from her mouth.
Saakhov: Nina, I've been waiting for you for so long!
Nina: And how I was waiting for you!
Saakhov: Really?
Nina : Of course not! Why did you kidnap me? Answer me!
Saakhov :I kidnapped you because..
“I’ll give you a bride price for you...” plays. Saakhov sings to the soundtrack.
Saakhov : Well, I’m also collecting my collection of wives. Well, show yourself to my wives..
Girls (wives) come out and start dancing.
Nina :Nothing will work out for you anyway! Shurik is already on his way! He..
Nina is gagged.
Experienced: Well, keep quiet!
Saakhov :Well, how do you think he will find you?( mocking ) Does he have a miracle donkey that, like a ranger, will find our shelter?
The Caucasians, Shurik and the donkey, take the stage.
One of the Caucasians:And the donkey actually found the trail, what a great fellow!
Shurik :As I said, I have a wonderful donkey! Come and kiss you while Nina doesn’t see( Kisses a donkey)
Saakhov: Shurik?
Shurik: Saakhov? Nina?
Nina: Shurik?
Experienced :Dumb? Which is what needed to be proven.
Shurik : How dare you, bastard! Gentlemen, police officers, tie up this man and his accomplices!
The Caucasians tie them up and they slowly walk away to the music with a sad look.
(Shurik's phone rings)
Shuri :Yes, yes, they found the Snow Maiden..What?! Do you also need an artistic act?! What to do..
At these harsh words the trio turns around
Experienced : Don’t worry Shurik, we have a great dance!
Dunce :I've never seen anything like this before
Coward: come on, in a row.
And everyone is dancing a flash mob.
Narrator :So our New Year’s film “Prisoner of the Caucasus” has ended. And we, ninth grade, would like to wish you all a great New Year celebration from the bottom of our hearts! Happy New Year to everyone! HURRAY!!!
P.S. You can explode the confetti at the end.
There are different ways to carry out the bride ransom, which precedes a trip to the registry office or church for the wedding. Some prefer themed ransoms in the style of traffic police, a women's hostel or a fairy tale, others simply prepare competitions and other tests for the groom on the “approaches” to an apartment or private house. Others believe that their script will be most original if it is written exclusively in verse. But it is better to approach this issue in an original way and conduct a ransom in the style of the well-known film “Prisoner of the Caucasus”. Such an event will help cheer up the bride and groom and, perhaps, dispel their anxiety before going to the registry office, where a serious and responsible wedding procedure will be carried out.
Territory decoration, props, presenters’ costumes
It should be immediately noted that this event will be hosted by three girls: they will get the roles of the Coward, the Dunce and the Experienced. True, they will have to forget about the beautiful outfits they prepared for their friend’s wedding for a while, because they will be dressed in the costumes of the humorous trio from everyone’s favorite film.
To create the Goonie look, you will need worn sweatpants with extended knees, a white T-shirt, sneakers and an Uzbek skullcap. Experienced, as you may remember from the film, was a man of serious build, so to recreate this image you will need to wrap the girl’s body with foam rubber. And she should be dressed in trousers, a striped T-shirt and a dark-colored cap. For the role of the Coward, you need to choose a girl of the smallest build, and you can dress her up in a light shirt with short sleeves, light trousers, boots and a hat. Don't forget also about the striped wide tie, which was the main attribute of this movie character. This ransom does not require any special registration of the territory.. On the asphalt, you should draw two winding lines depicting a mountain path, prepare two brooms and a bouquet of roses, equally packaged in gift paper, and cards with questions about the bride and her family.
Meeting the groom
The first car with guests should be met by an elderly relative or neighbor of the bride. She runs out onto the road wearing a scarf tied in an oriental style, waving her arms. When the procession stops, the woman must tell them a simple text, which is quite easy to remember: Oh, woe, woe, our niece was kidnapped, captured, right in a sleeping bag from the garden and dragged away. Komsomol member, athlete, beauty! You, groom, will have to face a lot of difficulties and defeat the villains in order to free her from captivity and take her to the registry office. The groom and his guests drive up to the bride's house, where the bridesmaids, dressed as well-known movie characters, are waiting for him. It is worth noting here that in order for the girls not to get confused, it is necessary to choose among them the one who will pronounce the main text and explain the conditions of the test to the groom, so that there is no confusion during the ransom. Let's assume it will be Experienced. The trio stands in the middle of the road, blocking the path of the wedding procession. The girls need to hold hands, and put the Coward in the middle of the chain, who, as in the film, will actively struggle, feign fear and close his eyes. Experienced: Well, tell me, why did you complain, that they forgot here? For the bride? How's that for a bride?! There are no brides here, well, get out of here! Get out quickly, otherwise you will have a “sea moment”: a moment at sea...
Competition “Describe your favorite”
Don't agree? Well, okay, we have your bride, a Komsomol member, an athlete and just a beauty. We just won’t give her away just like that, but we will ask for a ransom. At least five flocks of sheep. No sheep, pay in rubles or euros according to the exchange rate! But first, you, groom, describe your beloved to us in thirty words, but only with affectionate compliments. The groom needs to list thirty good qualities of the bride. Friends can help him with this. For every word that the groom cannot remember, he will have to pay. The money for this and other competitions will be collected by the Goonie and hidden in his trouser pockets, rubbing his hands together..
Competition “Three words about love”
Experienced: I see you like our Komsomol member and athlete. Now you need to prove to her how much you love her. But we don’t know how you will do this, because you can’t shout near the house - Comrade Saakhov can hear, and if you whisper, the bride won’t hear you. 
So think about how to tell her about your love in three different languages? The groom faces a difficult task. He must confess his love to his chosen one in three different languages, and do this in such a way as not to wake up Comrade Saakhov. At such an exciting moment, not all young people will think of using a mobile phone for these purposes. By the way, bridesmaids should warn the bride in advance so that she keeps her cell phone nearby and can answer the groom if necessary.
Competition “Imitation of Bride Kidnapping”
Experienced: Well, you have completed your task, but if necessary, can you, unnoticed in the darkness of the night, take your beloved out of the house? So it will also need to be carried along mountain paths... Now we will check this! In this competition, the groom must be assisted by a witness. Among the guests, you should choose a girl of not very large build (this could be a teenage girl or even a bridesmaid playing the role of a Coward). The girl must be placed in a sleeping bag, in which the groom and the witness must carry her along a winding path drawn on the asphalt with chalk.
Dunce and Experienced, as well as the guests present at the ransom, must carefully monitor that neither one nor the other goes beyond the path. Otherwise, they will have to pay for the mistake.
Dramatization of the song “If I were a Sultan”
Experienced: Well, groom, you went through some tests, and you overcame them well. But we haven’t decided yet whether you should give your bride away or marry her to Comrade Saakhov. Maybe you’ll change your mind, but for now we’ll sing you a life-giving, motivating song. Coward, Dunce and Experienced perform for the groom and guests a song from the film “Prisoner of the Caucasus” “If I were a Sultan”. If the girls do not want to sing themselves, you can play a soundtrack with a recording of this song. The main thing is to make sure that they are dressed appropriately. The coward should find a hat, which can be replaced with an ordinary fur hat, the Goonie should be dressed in a Circassian coat, and a turban of bright red fabric should be tied on the head of the Experienced.
Competition "Bouquet for your beloved"
Experienced: Well, have you changed your mind about getting married? 
Even the Sultan would be single, but you still won’t calm down!.. Well, okay, then let’s move on to the next test. Now you have to choose a bouquet for your beloved. You just need to choose the bouquet properly. And then Comrade Saakhov went all out of his way to her, took the fruit, took off his hat, and she arranged something for him that Mom, don’t worry! The essence of the competition is as follows: in a large box there are three similar bouquets wrapped in gift paper. The groom should guess where exactly the bouquet is located. If he accidentally chooses a broom, he will have to pay for the mistake. With this bouquet he will go to his beloved.
Competition “Only the Facts”
Experienced: And now we must find out how well you treat your beloved and how attentive you are to everything that happens in your life. Now I will ask you questions, and you must answer them. For every mistake you will have to pay. Here is a sample list of questions for the groom:
- When did you meet your bride, name the date and place where it happened?
- What is the name of the future mother-in-law by name and patronymic?
- What does a father-in-law affectionately call his mother-in-law at home?
- What is the name of the bride's favorite cat?
Don't know which one to make? Perhaps you will like our cool version? Are you thinking about what hairstyle to wear when going to your friend’s wedding? our recommendations. At the following address you can read about what unusual wedding suits for men there are.
- What color are your lover's eyes?
- What color are her cat's eyes?
- Maybe you know the color of your mother-in-law's eyes?
- When is the bride's birthday?
- What day was your future father-in-law born?
- What is your lover's favorite dish?
- What dish does she cook best?
- What color clothes does your future wife prefer to wear?
- What was the first gift she gave you?
- In honor of what event?
The long-awaited meeting with the bride
Experienced: Well 
Well, groom, come into the house, now you have to meet the bride and experience your happiness. Only now, first, Comrade Saakhov will try to enter the room again. For the last test, you need to prepare two identical trays with fruit and a vase of flowers. Comrade Saakhov will be the first to enter the room where the bride is hiding (his role can be played by one of the guests). The “comrade” should have a hat on his head, which Byvaly will take off before entering the room, after Saakhov’s legendary request: “Take off your hat.” Behind a closed door, the bride should shout and rattle the dishes. Saakhov must leave the room with a sad look, with a carnation hanging on his ear. This scene will bring the “Prisoner of the Caucasus” ransom scenario as close as possible to what happened in the famous film. The groom will enter the room next. With the same tray, only without the hat. He will come out of there after some time with a happy bride. Experienced: Well, the ransom took place, why are your mouths open? Coward, dunce, let's quickly share the loot, ugh, that is, what we acquired through back-breaking labor.
After the ransom is over, the newlyweds and the mother of the bride should be left alone so that the future mother-in-law can use icons to bless her son-in-law and daughter for marriage. This ritual, which in Old Russian times was considered a sacrament, is carried out in a room behind a closed door.
The cameraman filming the wedding should also not be in the room at this moment. After this, the guests traditionally drink champagne at the bride’s house and go to the registry office with the newlyweds. At this time, the girls who played the role of the legendary film trinity will have the opportunity to change clothes and put themselves in proper shape. Well, in the next video, you can see with your own eyes the original bride ransom scenario in the style of “Prisoner of the Caucasus”: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XjLWeSHvOeg
Home > Document Teacher's Day 2011 Scene "Prisoner of the Caucasus". 1st. Bambarbia kirgudu. 2nd. Our dear teachers and school staff! 3rd. Markavara kuse. 2nd. We're here to thank you for your hard work. 1st Mymsyn carats. 2nd. It doesn't translate any further, so we'd better sing. Song "If I were a Sultan" If I were a sultan, I would go to school And become a teacher, I would read books, But on the other hand, in such matters There are so many troubles and worries - ah, God save me. Chorus: It’s not bad at all to be a teacher. It’s much better to live in peace. We, sultans, know how hard it is for you. Do everything, take everything into account with our children. Tears are flowing like a river, but we want to thank you hundreds and hundreds of times. Chorus: It’s not bad at all to be a teacher. It’s much better to live in peace. We would like to wish everyone from the bottom of our hearts happiness And for new victories, dial strength. A warm greeting to all teachers. Let's just say: there is no one better than you in this world. Chorus: It’s not bad at all to be a teacher And teach children in our school. 2. And now a song for our captain Lyudmila Leonidovna Song The lilac fog over our school is melting, In your big eyes there is anxiety and sadness, After all, we again do not have enough paint for repairs. You want to send everything into the lilac distance! Into the lilac distance - whitewashing and painting, Into the lilac fog - a water tap, Into the lilac fog - window putty. And your vacation floated away into a lilac fog! In the lilac distance are the Canary Islands and Hawaii. You would like to leave by a goal, or maybe two... Or maybe you dream of leaving forever. You dream, but you can barely get there! The lilac fog over our school is melting, the Director is sitting in it, and it’s not easy for him - He is not in a hurry to go home, the director understands: He will have to solve all the issues himself! Word to the director
……….
Sketch of Othello and Desdemona Othello
(rushes towards her) I hear footsteps. Finally at home
My wife. And he'll cook me lunch.
I'm fucking hungry, Desdemona! Desdemona Othello, I don't have lunch. Othello I really have no time for jokes, my dear,
Our refrigerator has been empty for a long time!
I'm just dying of hunger... Desdemona But I was working, not at the cinema! Othello What's in your bag? Notebooks again!
Did you bring it home?! Woe is me! Desdemona I see that your nerves are not all right,
You even screamed more than once in your sleep.
He sits down to check his notebooks. Othello Listen, Desdemona, really
It would be nice to have a snack now! Desdemona Othello! We already ate today!
And it’s even harmful to eat at such a late hour.
But if you really want, you can, honey,
Fry the eggs, just do it yourself.
Don't distract me, please, my love!
There are three eggs left, that's enough for us. Othello What three? I ate two yesterday. Desdemona All right. Fry yourself one. Othello But the refrigerator is empty! Desdemona Well, I don’t know where it could suddenly disappear?! Othello Listen, I have a job too,
But I can’t think of anything because I’m hungry! Desdemona Oh, darling, come on, really, think of something...
Do your homework! And hunger will disappear. Othello My hunger will not be satisfied. Really
Is it so difficult for you to go to the store? Desdemona I thought I'd come by at the end of the week,
But you could buy something yourself!
You're disturbing me, honey. By the way,
So little time left, dear!
I will be on duty at school until nightfall:
My class is walking at the disco. Othello What disco?! What kind of joke?
Our family is about to be destroyed! Desdemona Oh, you know, there's not a minute left,
My class is already waiting for me there, go. Othello Like hell from incense, you run away from home.
Work is more important to you, not family.
Have you prayed at night, Desdemona?
Die, unfortunate one! Die, my love!
Together- And despite all this, you come to class every morning. (The presenters, a boy and a girl, 1st grade students, come on stage.)
Girl: Today we will congratulate you,
Sing songs and read poems.
Maybe we'll dance, maybe we won't,
This is our biggest, biggest secret!
Boy: Our guys tied up the presenters,
So that we can talk about our lives.
Teacher's Day holiday is only once a year.
Boy and girl (in unison, threateningly): We’ll tell you everything now.
Ooooh!
(The phonogram “Chained by One Chain” by the group “Nautilus Pampilius” plays; children come out from behind the scenes, bending under the weight of their backpacks; in the foreground, a boy crawls, pushing a briefcase in front of him. There is detachment and fatigue on the children’s faces.)
Children (sing to the tune of the song):
It's a huge amount of time for us to sit at our desks.
Conjugations, verbs - a tedious lesson.
They added English, they think that
We still don't need enough lessons.
And so we crawl to school, we don’t have the strength to straighten up,
Our hands can no longer bend our hands.
And so we walk across Russia every day
In a crowd, bent, we crawl with a backpack.
Bound by one chain, bound by one goal.
Shackled by one chain, bound by one...
(The phonogram of the song “We are little children” is played, sung by a boy reclining in the foreground.)
Boy (singing):
The sun is shining above us, not life, but grace,
It’s time for everyone who is responsible for us to understand,
It’s time for everyone who is responsible for us to understand:
We are little children, we want to go for a walk!
(The soundtrack of the song “Poor Sheep” from the film “Dog in Boots” plays.)
Children (sing to the tune of the song):
And we are second graders, we are completely adults,
We hardly go for walks, we all need to cram.
Save the poor kids.
In class we multiply, write and read.
We don’t know any rest at all; we don’t go for walks.
Save the poor kids.
(A first-grader comes out.)
First grader: If only I knew what torment
I'll have to endure
I would stay in kindergarten
Another six years!
(shakes his fist at the audience)
Girl: Guys, what's wrong with you? That's not what we wanted to say at all.
There are sections and clubs at school so that you don’t get bored.
So that they don’t howl from longing, so that they can play.
You can sing or dance, or kick a ball around the hall.
And you will have time to walk outside.
I think I know who came up with all this, probably the poor student Petrov, he is always dissatisfied with everything!
(Petrov runs out.)
Petrov (shouting): Atas! The presenters are unleashed!
(Children run screaming from the stage into the audience.)
Girl: And they said the briefcases were heavy! (leaves)
1st presenter: Finally free! Our dear and beloved teachers, today we want to congratulate you on your professional holiday! Wish you all the best!
2nd presenter: Primary school students have prepared a musical gift for you, listen to the song “Hello, school!”
(The song “Hello School” is played to the tune of the song from the film “The Scarecrow-Meow”.)
The morning begins, begins,
The children are waking up, waking up.
Put on your school uniform,
We all took our briefcases with us.
And with a cheerful smile
We flew to school. One, two, sun, three, four, five!
I will learn to count and multiply.
And I will also learn to share,
Hello school! The school is very cool, very great.
We learn a lot of new things, a lot of new things.
And we solved problems,
Essays were written
In English they spoke
They sang and taught poetry. One, two, sun, three, four, five!
If you get five, you can play!
Lessons are over, I need to play.
Hello childhood! 1st presenter: Nowadays there is a lot of debate on the topic of school uniforms. Some are for, some are against...
2nd presenter: And now we will listen to those who are very concerned about this topic.
(Sketch “The school uniform is important - the school uniform is necessary” to the tune of Ukupnik’s penalty “Sima”.)
Teacher: I've been walking around school for many years now,
I've seen a lot of things here.
Different outfits for the girls,
But I haven’t seen a school uniform.
Lena, Zulfiya il Serafima,
It's the same as summer or winter.
Their navels and backs are bare,
Eastern fashion has come to us.
Class, line up!
(Students run out in short tops, jeans, low-waisted skirts, and bright jewelry.)
Gulchatay, Gulchatay!
(A student runs out in jeans, but with her stomach covered, without makeup.)
Gulchat, open your face! (she pulls up her shirt and exposes her stomach)
Students(sing to the tune of the song "Eastern Tales"):
Oriental fairy tales, we like to make eyes
Jeans on our hips are simply disgusting!
It would be great if the school had a uniform like this,
Tops with thin straps.
Teacher: Hey beautiful girl, I really like you
But I can’t give you a five.
I didn’t do the assignment, there are no examples in the notebook, huh?
Pupil: Oh, I had no time yesterday. I will tell.
(further sings to the tune of the song "Fish" by the group "Factory")
I looked in the mirror yesterday and admired how beautiful she was.
I rolled my eyes a little, dressed up and began to wait for the prince.
He will definitely come because I sent the photo to the Internet.
I didn’t study my lessons, yes. I was hanging out on my favorite website.
My favorite site is "Dating" I often visit,
I send photos to potential princes.
Teacher (to the tune of the song "I didn't understand"):
Isn't it too early for you to think about princes?
Maybe baby needs to study better?
Life is not a fairy tale, believe me, get books in your hands soon
And quickly forget about the princes.
(the photogram sounds, gradually fading, “He would come up...”)
1 presenter Now listen to ditties performed by the duet "Naughty Guys"!
- We are young guys
Mischievous and cheerful
Let's sing the verses now
To you from the heart, from the soul.
- Yes! Today it's definitely possible
3. Today is a holiday, that means
We will congratulate you.
Let's have happiness and good luck,
And wish you fun!
4. But first we’ll tell you
About your life.
Oh, it’s hard for the youth:
Everything is wrong, everything is wrong.
5. There Tanyusha ran,
Avon catalog in hand.
No time to learn lessons
Sells eye shadow and mascara.
6. Oh, and in the school corridor
Someone's voices are heard.
The girls didn't share the mascara
And they grabbed the hair.
7. Look, Lucy is limping
With a fashionable bag over your shoulder.
At ten years old she’s already big -
Wears shoes with heels.
8. Look, along the corridor
A bunch of girls are walking
All their belly buttons are outward,
Their belly is visible bare.
9. Lots of time girls
They give away fashionable rags,
They're stupid, they don't understand
The main thing is what they have here.
(points to head)
10. We wish you a lot of light,
Laughter, happiness and love.
Don’t forget about our advice -
The main thing is what's inside.
11. Our director is all about business, It’s not easy to manage a school, These aren’t ditties for you to perform at a concert 12. We are young guys,
Mischievous and cheerful.
We've run out of verses,
We are waiting for applause! Grandmas Matryona comes out, daydreaming, bumps into Flower, she shakes her.. 2. Matryona! Matryon! 1.Huh? What?? 2.Are you having your head in the clouds? 1. Even higher. I thought: It would be great to fly to the moon! 2.Correct. She's nearby. You will fly out in the morning and return by lunchtime. Just don't forget to take your felt boots. 1.Well, laugh, please. But when you hear on the radio that I’ve flunked out... 2.Where did I flunk out from - from the class? 1. Come on!.. And now I’m flying in a state of weightlessness. All objects float in the air... 2.And you float on all objects. 1. I fly to the Moon, stay there... 2. In the second year. 1. For half an hour, so that everyone can see on TV that I’m on the Moon! And then I... 2.Fell from the moon? 1. She didn’t fall, but landed. They greet me. The orchestras are playing! The chief designer shakes my hand! My portraits are everywhere! And at school there is a wall newspaper in my honor, which tells how I... 2. Got a D in math... Song (Belle) Two! I got two points in geometry! Yes! Let me roll over my homework! But! But we are beautiful and kind inside, We are ready to write cheat sheets before dawn! It’s terrible when there’s no one to blow away - These formulas make my head so dirty! Horrible! Even though we give each other everything for a ride, But in the lesson there is only the silence of the lambs, And even though we don’t know the days or the nights, we can’t see the A’s like our own ears. Oh mathematics! – it has been clear to everyone for a long time, Pythagoras once knew everything for a B, - I was able to master you for a two plus, Grandmas The flower comes out with its head down 1. Little flower, why are you so sad 2. They sang songs about everyone, but forgot about me 1. Now we’ll all arrange (claps his hands) a song in the studio... Song (Katyusha) The flowers were blooming in the plot, and the onions were already ripe in the garden. Natasha went out into the garden and gathered the girls for a circle. Oh, dear girls, dear ones, the harvest is indeed rich. They worked well, they worked hard, and the director is undoubtedly happy. You taught us to work, to work, even though at times we were lazy. And today we congratulate you and wish you happiness from the bottom of our hearts. And only God knows if you are an A+! 1st presenter: Today we congratulate our teachers and school graduates on the holiday, for whom this is the last holiday. At the end of the year they will have exams in the form of the Unified State Exam.
2nd presenter: By the way, we have a number on this topic, let's listen.
Song (Combat) Everything is like in a movie, like in a war, Pushkin is sobbing on the wall. We are taking the test for the umpteenth time, Or maybe we, or maybe us... And in the spring, and in the spring Birds fly in the heights, And her exam is being taken by our ninth grade class once again. Chorus: Battalion commander, mamanya, mamanya, battalion commander, It was not for nothing that you apparently drove the guys, And every student firmly grasped the Great, mighty Russian language! Battalion commander, mamanya, mamanya, battalion commander We will win the battle for our certificate, After all, everyone has mastered your science: Difficult in learning - easy in battle! 1st presenter: It's kind of gloomy. I’m already afraid of the Unified State Exam, and Iga, and aha-ha.
2nd presenter: Don't be afraid, everything will be alright. 1st presenter: Our dear teachers!
Today, greeting you with warm love from the bottom of my heart
We wish you happiness and health!
2nd presenter: You are always young at heart, sharing your work and joys with us,
Our strict, our dear, patient teachers!
1st presenter: You give us a lot of strength and love, no matter what,
How you believe in us, which, perhaps, no one can believe like that! (N. Rudakova)
2nd presenter: And now a musical congratulation in the form of a medley.
Eh, little lambs, sweets, containers and rastabars.
We are the school Gems, wild guitars.
Let's trench, strum, drum,
And now we’ll tell you how we live at school,
We'll tell you now.
(to the tune of the song Mama Maria" performed by J. Friske)
I'm walking along the corridors, I'll get my textbooks soon,
I want to tell you a paragraph I taught recently.
About the current that passes through the circuit, and there is wind in my head.
But as long as someone teaches us, everything will be fine, yes.
(to the tune of the song “Margarita” performed by V. Leontyev)
Learn to come to school again,
Cramming again, going to the board.
Don't sleep again, get up at seven o'clock,
And I want to walk until late.
There's a magazine in your hands, maybe not me?
I'm biting my nails out of excitement.
That's bad luck again,
They call me to the board, as luck would have it.
Yes, a teacher, well, of course, of course she taught.
Oh, teacher, oh, teacher, I just forgot
Yes, teacher, yes, I remember, yesterday it was.
(to the tune of the song "The Seventh Petal" performed by the Hi-Fi group)
Aromas of vanilla, smells of pies
They beckoned us to the canteen, rushing without feeling our feet.
We sat in class thinking only about
To speed up the change, let's go have a snack.
(to the tune of the song "Loaves" performed by M. Grebenshchikov)
Your loaves, they are buns,
Yulka and I were distracted again.
And your pies and cupcakes
They completely broke my heart.
(to the tune of the song “I didn’t understand” performed by V. Serduchka)
Physical education is an impossible subject,
It’s very difficult for me to run every time,
When the whistle blows, pump up your abs, throw the ball into the basket,
Time to take the 100-meter test.
I seduced him as best I could
And she frightened me with her illnesses.
It’s just bad luck, I’m almost crying,
He does not give in to provocation.
It would be better if he came up and said: “Girls,
I'm letting you go home today.
You can even come without a uniform.
That would be funny!"
We only like to play sports,
And what we sometimes whine about is nonsense!
So you shouldn't be offended by us.
That's how it is.
(to the tune of the song "Moments")
Don't think down on your work.
Or rather, not about work - about technology.
It is needed to be sure
I could do something with my own hands.
Sew, for example, bed linen,
Robes, aprons and bedspreads.
For example, I sewed a shirt, here,
Although I didn't break the machine a little.
I know how to plant in a garden,
Weed, dig and operate a rake.
I will never get lost in my life.
Thank you teacher, technology!
Thank you!
(to the tune of the song "Grandma" performed by V. Presnyakov)
It happens that life doesn’t spoil you,
There is a continuous cover.
And only kind, cool,
And only kind and cool
He will comfort you and understand.
We are all her own children,
She is in worries and labors
He watches over our upbringing,
She's like a second mother.
Cool Masha, cool Ira,
Sveta, Oksana, Olga, Galina.
Cool Luda and Iraida,
and Rasimya, and Nadezhda, Irina.
Cool, cool, we love you.
(to the tune of the song "Lady Perfection" from the film "Mary Poppins")
And their clothes and notebooks are always in order.
Appearance: makeup, manicure, pedicure,
Hairstyle, feelings and soul.
Lady teacher.
There are male teachers, they are gallant and courteous.
We have only five of them, but as in the plays of Dumas,
Like the musketeers of the school our honor
Everyone can be protected.
Mister, Mister teacher! We congratulate you all, we wish you a lot of happiness,
We wish you health and patience.
Don't be angry with us, just smile at us,
Let your smiles shine, teachers!
Lady, lady teacher! Mister, Mister teacher! We told you about the school, maybe we lied a little.
You don't need to be offended by us at all.
And get angry, rightly they sang from the heart,
How good!
After all, today is your holiday. We promise not to do any mischief.
We won’t snap, write on desks or damage furniture,
We promise, we are your students.
Lady student. We promise to study and never be lazy
And cram all the pages, answer only five.
This will be your bliss: children are all perfection,
We are perfection itself. We are everyone's ideal.
Lady student. 1st presenter: Today we have gathered for a holiday, There is no occasion more worthy and beautiful. We honor all the teachers who are loved in our school. 2nd presenter: Your work is important and needed! Sometimes it can be very difficult, 1st presenter::But you just need to know that the guys value, wait for and love you! The final song plays.
Final song, soundtrack: This world was not invented by us Today we say “Thank you” to your family For the sincerity of the soul For the pure tender look You gave us A wonderful school world In the language of good Everyone speaks in it Chorus: The school world was not invented by us The school world was not invented by me The school world is rich in miracles There is a big magician teacher in it One only once Each of us has first grade And a graduation party Dear teacher Congratulate from the bottom of our hearts They want you today All the children of the Earth Chorus: 2nd presenter: On this day we wish you well, success, joy, happiness and smiles, 1st presenter:: May your life always be wise - From indifference, resentment and mistakes 2nd presenter: Let her be able to protect and protect you! It means so much to a teacher! 1st presenter:: May your difficult but wonderful path be bright! We wish you patience and good luck! Together: Happy Teacher's Day!
Characters:
Saakhov
Ajabrail
Lelik
Gesha
Experienced
Dunce
Coward
Waitress
Doctor
Leading: Here we are dealing with a happy, I would say, accident in production. These are not your grandfather's customs and grandmother's rituals. You came here to hear a fairy tale, and we are here and now working to make this fairy tale come true.
Saakhov: Dear, I see a big holiday in this restaurant today!?
Ajabrail: Today we have a joyful, bright, sunny holiday. Today the guests congratulate the hero of the day, wish her happiness, love, you know, through toasts and songs. Tatyana Grigorievna....,
Saakhov: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah! What are you saying!? Who is this?
Ajabrail: Meet me, this is our hero of the day, my boss Tatyana Grigorievna! Yes, listen! Today is the anniversary of a wonderful man!
Saakhov: Tsk-tsk-tsk. We consulted here and decided that Tatyana Grigorievna, asile... alice personifies all the best in our area, oh, no, in the inspection, I swear by my mother - she’s smart, an activist, and finally, she’s just beautiful. An excellent example to follow. (to the hero of the day) Honest noble word! (with a burning gaze) How do you feel if you and I sing now?
Jubilee: Well, overall it’s positive. I'm fine.
Ajabrail: (slyly looking at Saakhov and looking at his watch) No, it’s too early for her to think about it!
Saakhov: By the way, it’s not too early for anyone to think about this, and it’s never too late! (looks back at the hero of the day and looks positively appraising) (sly halftone)
Ajabrail: Listen, shame on you for offending the birthday girl, because right now she has no one around her except the team - 25!
Saakhov: This is not true, not true, I highly appreciate your dear boss! But there is a limit to everything, well, yes, yes. - 18!
Ajabrail: Yes, have a conscience! You still get it, and what a reward! And for all this I’m asking for 25 million, it’s even ridiculous to bargain!
Saakhov: You are talking apo-apolitically, dear, I swear, honestly. You don’t understand the political situation, you see life through the prism of price discipline. I swear, honestly. 25 million, at a time when our region has only just completed its semi-annual report, and so little money has been filled into the budget...
Ajabrail: Don’t confuse your personal money with government money!
Saakhov: And I, by the way, dear comrade, was put here to look after the state interests! Sit down for now, basically...
Saakhov: 20
Ajabrail: 25
Saakhov: 20-20, we’ll sort out the privateers, clarify the budget reimbursement and the certificate of honor...
Ajabrail: and a free trip (thinks)
Saakhov: To Moscow! To the board! (you can offer your own option, for example, where employees go on business trips).
Ajabrail: Okay, okay, okay (thinks) that means, the customer agrees, the team (looks at everyone and asks a question) wants to “replenish the budget”?... that means they also agree, only the birthday girl remains (fingers doubtfully)
Saakhov: Oh, we’re bad at educating young people, they’ve just been born, but they’re no longer ready to sacrifice for a good cause. Do you understand?
Ajabrail: We'll steal it!
Saakhov: (looks intrigued and indignant) what do you mean steal?
Ajabrail: (to invited guests, squinting his eyes) Will you help us kidnap the hero of the day?
Guests: And we will transfer it to the trade union to protect the interests...
Ajabrail: No no. And pass it on to the kunaks...
Guests: corrupt trade union.
Saakhov: Tsk-tsk-tsk, (dissatisfied) these are our people.
Ajabrail: Yes, yes, they may not justify your high trust. Don't worry, this will be done by complete strangers!
Saakhov: And not from our area!
Ajabrail: (and throws up his hands) Well, of course! (points to the kunaks) Here they are.
(kunaks appear and sing a song to the tune: "If I were a sultan, I would have three wives...")
From a foreign country, from overseas countries
We have come to you in the country of Russians
Oh, Tatyana is beauty, oh, queen of the day,
We dance and sing just for you!
Chorus:
At Tanya's today
Big anniversary
Come on, kunaki,
Dance more fun!!!
That the years are not a problem, just part of the way.
If I look at you, I'll only give you 23.
So young at heart, with a sparkle in her eye,
Like the sun is clear - oh, go crazy!
Chorus:
And it is true,
Kunaks don’t lie -
It's gratifying to watch
To your charms!
Let's be honest with you: "Oh, Tatyana is a jan,
Every Sultan would take you into his harem!
You won't find such golden hands in the world,
Let us kiss you for that!
Chorus:
At Tanya's today
Big anniversary
Come on, kunaki,
Dance more fun!!!
(knock on the door, a waitress comes in and brings out 3 bottles of beer on a tray)
Saakhov: what you allow yourself, you understand!
Waiter: I brought the order, as you asked, in triplicate! (The Goonie, Experienced and Coward come out and sort out the beer on the tray)
Coward: (rubs hands, takes beer) life, as they say, is good!
Experienced: A good life is even better!
Dunce: Exactly!
(kunaks notice the hall and turn to the authorities and guests)
Experienced: Barkabarly kuzal
Ajabrail: he says bon appetit!
Dunce: Bambarbia Kirgudu
Ajabrail: as you may have guessed, he says: if you refuse, they will kidnap you themselves.
Dunce: (smiles slyly) Joke!
Dunce: Oh, there are a lot of them!
Coward: (shook away) Witnesses!
Dunce: And if they (shows as if he is strangling someone)
Experienced: Only without casualties!
Coward: Yes, we must leave!
Experienced: That's right, let's leave!
The script for the play "New Year's Captive, or Shurik's New Adventures" for 9th grade was created by me in December 2010 based on the highest-grossing film comedies of the USSR from director Leonid Gaidai: "Operation "Y" and other adventures of Shurik", "Prisoner of the Caucasus", "Diamond" hand", "Ivan Vasilyevich is changing his profession." The rapid movement of the main idea, excellent pace, dynamics, “catch phrases” from the films of the recognized master of comedy, as well as Shurik, Comrade Saakhov, the famous trinity, Father Frost, Snow Maiden, bunnies - in this New Year's story. Music by Alexander Zatsepin and modern compositions accompany the struggle between “good and evil”, in which, of course, “good” wins.
Download:
Preview:
Script for the play “New Year’s Captive or Shurik’s New Adventures”
p/n | Characters: | Performers: | Page |
Snow Maiden | |||
Storyteller | |||
Bunny 1 | |||
Bunny 2 | |||
Bunny 3 | |||
Bunny 4 | |||
Bunny 5 | |||
Bunny 6 | |||
Bunny 7 | |||
Bunny 8 | |||
Saakhov | |||
Lyolik | |||
Coward | |||
Dunce | |||
Experienced | |||
Shurik | |||
Oriental girl 1 | |||
Oriental girl 2 | |||
Oriental girl 3 | |||
Father Frost |
SCENE 1
Music No. 1: “Trinity March.”
SCENE 2
Music No. 2: "Market".
STORYTELLER.
In some kingdom
In a magical state
Once upon a time we lived and did not grieve,
We were friends with the bunnies
Ded Moroz and Snegurochka,
Finally, just a beauty!
Music No. 2: "Market".
The storyteller leaves.
Ded Moroz and Snegurochka.
FATHER FROST. Snow Maiden, do you know whose year is approaching?
SNOW MAIDEN. Of course I know, grandpa! Year of the HARE!
FATHER FROST. That's right, granddaughter!.. Year of the HARE! This animal is interesting.
SNOW MAIDEN. And our bunnies, grandpa, are not just interesting, but unprecedented.
FATHER FROST. Why unseen?
SNOW MAIDEN. Because, grandpa, they can walk on their hind legs, much more than usual. But the most important thing is that they understand human speech and know how to speak. Ah... Here they are.
Music No. 3: “Snowflake.”
FATHER FROST. What cute animals!
SNOW MAIDEN. So, bunnies, let's answer: what are you a symbol of in the coming year?
Bunny. In the coming year we are a symbol of love!
Bunny. Worldly wisdom!
Bunny. Speed and agility!
FATHER FROST. Granddaughter, can your bunnies do anything else besides talk?
SNOW MAIDEN. Of course, grandpa. They were preparing a magical forest for the New Year.
FATHER FROST. Well done!
SNOW MAIDEN.
So, bunnies, let's answer:
Did you silver the spruce?
Are the trees covered with frost?
BUNNIES. Silvered...
BUNNIES. Dressed...
SNOW MAIDEN.
Were the bears hidden in dens?
Have the birds' nests been insulated?
BUNNIES. Covered...
BUNNIES. Insulated...
FATHER FROST. What friendly bunnies!
SNOW MAIDEN. Grandfather, they became even friendlier when they learned a scary story about one proud bird.
FATHER FROST. What kind of story?
SNOW Maiden (to the bunny ). Tell me, oblique, about the proud bird!
Bunny. When the whole flock flew south for the winter, ONE small but proud bird said: “Personally, I will fly straight into the sun!” And she began to rise higher and higher, but very soon she burned her wings and fell to the very bottom of the deepest gorge!
FATHER FROST. Yes! A very instructive story, bunnies. None of you, no matter how high you “fly”, should be separated from the team!
One bunny is crying bitterly.
SNOW MAIDEN. What's happened? What, dear?
Bunny (whining) . Birdie... it's a pity...
FATHER FROST. Don't cry, darling! The small but proud bird cannot be returned.
SNOW MAIDEN. Unfortunately, it cannot be returned.
FATHER FROST. To prevent such sad stories from happening in our team, we need to take care of each other, especially the Snow Maiden.
Music No. 4: “Summer has passed.”
Santa Claus is leaving. Then - bunnies.
Snow Maiden.
Saakhov and Lyolik are heading towards the girl.
Saakhov looks the Snow Maiden from head to toe.
SAAHOV. Lyolik, tell me: who is this?! A?!
LYOLIK. Snow Maiden.
SAAHOV. She's just beautiful, you know!!!
LYOLIK. She is also a boss, a student, a Komsomol member, and an athlete!
SAAHOV. Student, Komsomol member, athlete...
LYOLIK. I see you liked her.
SAAHOV. Listen, I really liked it! Simply beautiful!!!
LYOLIK. Chief, she is an excellent candidate for your wife. Yes, and Santa Claus will come in handy! There will always be gifts under the tree! Not family life, but a continuous holiday.
SAAHOV. Lyolik, it seems that on New Year’s Eve the Snow Maiden is always kidnapped by some evil forces!
LYOLIK. This is exactly what happens on New Year's Eve, Comrade Saakhov!
SAAHOV. Come on, dear comrade Lyolik, let's change this bad tradition.
LYOLIK. How?
SAAHOV. The Snow Maiden will marry me, and the New Year's abductions will stop, since I will protect her. No one will dare to steal the wife of Comrade Saakhov!
LYOLIK. This is not easy: she is the granddaughter of Santa Claus.
SAAHOV. I will make any sacrifices and agree to all your conditions!
LYOLIK. Any means any. I'll give you 25 sheep for your troubles!
SAAHOV. Of course, I highly appreciate your work, but there is a limit to everything... Yes?!.. 18!
LYOLIK. Have a conscience! You take Snow Maiden as your wife - a student, Komsomol member, athlete, beauty! And for all this I ask for 25 sheep! It's even funny to bargain!
SAAHOV. Apo... you are talking apolitically! You are speaking apolitically! I swear! Honestly! You don't understand the political situation. You see life only from the window of my personal car! I swear! Honestly! 25 sheep at a time when our region has not fully paid the state for wool and meat!
LYOLIK. Don’t confuse your personal wool with the state one!
Saakhov looks sternly at Lyolik.
SAAHOV. And I was placed here, Comrade Lyolik, to look after the interests of the state. In general, yes. Twenty sheep...
LYOLIK. 25!
SAAHOV. Twenty, twenty... Rosenlev refrigerator.
LYOLIK. What?
SAAHOV. Finnish, good... Certificate of honor.
LYOLIK. And a free trip...
SAAHOV. To Siberia!
LYOLIK. OK then.
SAAHOV. Fine.
They hit me on the hands.
LYOLIK. So, yes. The groom agrees. Me too. ( Doubting. ) What about the bride?
SAAHOV. Yes, we are still raising our youth poorly, very poorly. Surprisingly frivolous attitude towards marriage.
LYOLIK. Who even asks the bride? A bag on the head - that's all!
SAAHOV. Yes! That's right!.. A very correct decision. But I personally will not have anything to do with this.
LYOLIK. Not really! Don't worry. Complete strangers will do this.
SAAHOV. And... not from our area.
LYOLIK. Well! Certainly!
Music No. 5: “In the Restaurant.”
Saakhov and Lyolik leave in a good mood.
SCENE 3
Loud - quieter.
STORYTELLER.
You never know, how much time has passed,
I don’t know this, but I know:
The Coward, the Dunce, the Seasoned set off
Complete Lyolik's task in secret.
They want to deceive the Snow Maiden,
Catch her with a cunning bait!
The girl has no idea about anything
He smiles politely at passers-by...
Music No. 6: “On the Dance Floor.”
Loud.
The storyteller leaves.
Lyolik and the Trinity. Then - Snegurochka.
COWARD. Hello, Snow Maiden.
SNOW Maiden (smiling). Hello. (Silence.) I'm listening to you.
STUPID. Bambarbia! ( Smiling. ) Kirgud.
SNOW Maiden (not understanding). What did he say?
LYOLIK. He says: “We did not appear here by chance; we arrived secretly to negotiate with you.”
EXPERIENCED. Listen, Snow Maiden! Nowadays you are called to act in films, in Hollywood!
SNOW MAIDEN. It’s too early for me to think about this.
LYOLIK. As my boss says, it’s not too early for anyone to think about this, and it’s never too late, by the way!
COWARD. The film "Harry Potter" and "The Lord of the Rings"!
LYOLIK ( spectators laughing). Yeah, down the aisle to Saakhov!
STUPID. Johnny Depp will be the main partner, and Spielberg... himself... what's his name?
SNOW MAIDEN. Director?
STUPID. Director!
SNOW MAIDEN. I agree!
LYOLIK (joyfully ). This is wonderful! Amazing!
COWARD. However, screen tests need to be done. First - profile... ( Takes off. )
STUPID. Then - full face... ( Takes off. )
LYOLIK. Well... Get ready... Once!
Music No. 7: “Running in the opposite direction.”
Lyolik and the trio kidnap the Snow Maiden.
SCENE 4
Music No. 8: “Meeting.”
Loud - quieter.
STORYTELLER.
The Snow Maiden was stolen
They put me in the car and disappeared,
Lured by deception
They were sentenced to marry Saakhov.
Santa Claus is covered with gray hair,
It was dusted with frost.
He yearns and grieves,
Trouble eats the heart:
New Year will not come without the Snow Maiden!!!
Santa Claus is waiting for help.
The bunnies gave a blunder:
Shurik has been called!
Everyone who saw him will confirm
God did not offend the young man with his mind.
The kidnappers did not know such details,
Otherwise, maybe they didn’t even steal the Snow Maiden.
Music No. 9: “Exams.”
Loud.
The storyteller leaves.
Shurik and bunnies.
SHURIK. So what do we have?
Bunny. There is a kidnapping!
Bunny. Insidious crime!
SHURIK. Who was stolen?
Bunny. Snow Maiden!
SHURIK. Who stole? Who is the groom?
Bunny. We sometimes find out this at a wedding.
SHURIK. There will be no wedding!!! I didn’t steal the Snow Maiden, but I will return her!
Bunny. How can we save the Snow Maiden, Shurik?
SHURIK. Bravery, courage and once again courage in the fight against kidnappers, insignificant scoundrels, immoral types.
Bunny. I'm not a coward, but I'm afraid.
SHURIK (thinking ). So, I’ll tell you what: only brave hares can rescue the girl.
BUNNIES. How can we become braver?
SHURIK. The one who mows the grass three times a year at the most terrible hour will become brave!
BUNNIES. Where does this grass grow?
SHURIK.
In the dark blue forest,
Where the aspen trees tremble,
Where from the witch oaks
The leaves are flying around.
Bunny. What fear!
Bunny. How scary!
Bunny. Very scary!
Bunny. I'm not a coward, but I'm afraid!
SHURIK. If you want to help the Snow Maiden, you MUST stand in the dark blue forest at the most terrible hour!
Shurik leaves.
Bunny. Bunnies! Let's help the Snow Maiden! Let's all go together into this terrible forest to mow the grass!
Music No. 10: “Song about hares.”
Bunny dance.
SCENE 5
Music No. 11: “Loneliness.”
STORYTELLER.
Where is Lady New Year?
Lady Ice Tale?
Lives in captivity -
That's the answer!
Hollywood was not destiny:
They ask her to be a WIFE.
That's why she feels so bad!
That's why she's in so much pain!
But the Snow Maiden does not cry,
He doesn't trust anyone anymore.
And what?!.
It still hurts:
For her, loneliness is boredom!
For her, loneliness is torment!
Music No. 12: “Loneliness” (chorus).
The storyteller leaves.
Snow Maiden. Then - Lyolik, Saakhov, Trinity.
LYOLIK. Snow Maiden, you don’t have to eat, you don’t have to drink, you don’t have to be silent. It won't help you anyway! The best groom in the area offers his hand and heart... You have no conscience! You spit on our offer. Stupid! You have no other choice. (He looks at the girl.) Are you saying that they will be looking for you? Right! They will turn to me, and I will say: “She dropped out of college, got married and left.” So this is what I’ll tell you: either you marry Comrade Saakhov, or you won’t leave here at all! Answer something! See ( pointing to Saakhov): the man is waiting.
SNOW MAIDEN. I won’t talk to anyone except the prosecutor and I’m going on a hunger strike!
The Snow Maiden leaves.
LYOLIK (to Saakhov ). Still young, capricious!
SAAHOV. In general, yes. There are only two ways out of this house: either I take her to the registry office, or she takes me to the prosecutor.
LYOLIK. No need.
SAAHOV. I don’t want to... Nothing! In a day she will be hungry, in a week she will be even more sad, and in a month she will become smart. Nothing! Will wait.
LYOLIK. Will wait.
SAAHOV. Will wait.
Saakhov leaves.
LYOLIK ( addressing the trinity). Remember: you must finally justify the high trust placed in you. And you answer for the Snow Maiden with your head!
TRINITY (in chorus ). We will try, dear comrade Lyolik.
Music No. 13: “Promenade.”
Lyolik leaves.
The trio goes after the Snow Maiden.
They bring the Snow Maiden, but she leaves them again.
EXPERIENCED. This Snow Maiden is very capricious.
COWARD. There is no sweet spot with her!
STUPID. Still young, capricious!
EXPERIENCED. But we are responsible for it with our heads! They must take care of them, feed them, give them water.
COWARD. But she doesn't want to eat anything.
STUPID. We will not report this to our superiors. We will make a correct report for Comrade Saakhov. ( A coward. ) Sit down. Write from a new line: “Lunch.” Emphasize: “I refused soup.”
COWARD. "Refused."
STUPID. In parentheses: “Kharcho soup.”
COWARD. "Kharcho."
COWARD. "Into the abyss."
STUPID. Now wine: “I broke two bottles.”
COWARD. Three! We have three under the table.
STUPID. Write three.
COWARD. Three.
STUPID. So. Now fruits: “Oranges”.
COWARD. "Oranges."
EXPERIENCED. Stop messing up the paper! Let's better think about how to cheer up the Snow Maiden, otherwise she will completely wither away from melancholy and loneliness. We will be the ones to blame.
STUPID. Let's sing our favorite song for her.
EXPERIENCED. And what? Maybe your favorite one.
STUPID. We just can't do it alone!
COWARD. We can handle it if oriental girls help us!
Music No. 14: “If I were a Sultan.”
The girls invite the Snow Maiden.
Oriental dance of a trinity and girls.
The Snow Maiden leaves unnoticed at the end of the dance.
SCENE 6
Music No. 15: "The Ambassador's Exit".
Bunnies and Shurik appear in white gauze bandages.
Experienced, Goofy and Coward look at them in surprise.
EXPERIENCED. Who are you visiting?
SHURIK. Sanitary and epidemiological station. There is an epidemic in the area. General examination of the population. "Swine flu". Mandatory resolution.
STUPID. Damn it!.. Take off your shirt.
SHURIK. Just a shirt is not necessary at all. Come in for a checkup.
COWARD. Is it not painful?
SHURIK. Come to my assistants.
Trinity approaches. The examination is carried out by bunnie doctors.
SHURIK. Is there anyone else in the house?
TRINITY. No! No!
COWARD. Nobody!
SHURIK. Then my assistants will have a preventive conversation with you about “swine flu.” Have a seat.
The trio sits down.
Bunny. “Swine flu” is the conventional name for a disease in humans and animals caused by strains of the influenza virus. Strains associated with swine flu outbreaks are found among influenza viruses serotype C and subtypes serotype A.
Bunny. The swine flu virus is transmitted both through direct contact with infected organisms and through airborne droplets.
Bunny. The main symptoms are the same as normal flu symptoms.
Bunny. To prevent swine flu, vaccinations are given.
SHURIK. “Swine flu” develops especially rapidly in the body...
STUPID. In short, Sklikhosovsky!
COWARD. If you're not interested, don't bother me! Please continue.
SHURIK. ...develops especially rapidly in the body weakened by nicotine, alcohol and...
COWARD. ...bad excesses.
Bunny. Thus, in order to avoid the disease “swine flu”, it is necessary to get preventive vaccinations in a timely manner and lead a healthy lifestyle!
SHURIK. Are you sure there is no one else in the house except you?
TRINITY. No! No!
COWARD. Nobody!
SHURIK. If “swine flu” is not detected in time, then, as they say,“mome"nto mo"re"!
COWARD. Instantly...
STUPID. …in the sea!
SHURIK. Clear?
STUPID. Clear.
COWARD. A! It's clear.
SHURIK. From December 1 to December 31, 2010, our clinic is running a promotion: three vaccinations for the price of one!
EXPERIENCED. A tempting offer! We agree to go for vaccinations right now! Otherwise“mome"nto mo"re"!
COWARD. Instantly...
STUPID. …in the sea!
Music No. 16: “Final Overture.”
Shurik lets the whole trio through in turn and goes after her.
Bunny dance.
SCENE 7
Music No. 17: “Partners.”
Saakhov and Lyolik.
LYOLIK. Chief, everything is gone, everything is gone: the Snow Maiden ran away, my people disappeared!!! Everything is lost!!!
SAAHOV ( covers Lyolik’s mouth with a cap, he bites his finger). If a person is an idiot, then this will last for a long time!
LYOLIK. Boss, I'll fix everything!
SAAHOV. If you don’t fix it, you’ll live on one salary! I'm kind of tired. I'll probably take a bath and drink a cup of coffee. Still, think about how to correct the situation. Otherwise we will have a bath, and coffee, and “poop” with tea!
LYOLIK. I never expected this to happen. I probably should...
SAAHOV. No need!
LYOLIK. Now I have this proposal: what if...
SAAHOV. Not worth it!
LYOLIK. Clear! Then maybe you need...
SAAHOV. No need!
LYOLIK. It's clear. At least allow me...
SAAHOV. I don’t allow it... Because of you I have to tear my claws out. We will change the point. Relocate! Like this!
There's a knock on the door.
SAAHOV. Who is here?
Music No. 18: “The January blizzard is ringing...”.
Shurik, Snegurochka and Father Frost come in.
SAAHOV (scared ). H-hello. I didn't expect you to come! Such a surprise for me!
LYOLIK. Before the New Year, comrade Saakhov, Father Frost and Snow Maiden always come, ask riddles, give gifts...
SHURIK. We have already solved your riddles. And your trial will be our gift!
SAAHOV. What are you going to judge us for?
FATHER FROST. You ordered my granddaughter to be kidnapped, hid her, and made her suffer!
SNOW MAIDEN. He wanted to marry me.
SAAHOV. You have no right to judge us! You will be responsible for this!
SHURIK. We will not be responsible for your filthy skins.
SAAHOV. I'm ready to admit my mistakes!
LYOLIK. I also acted recklessly! I repent: I temporarily acted as the leader of the Snow Maiden’s kidnappers by order of Comrade Saakhov!
SAAHOV. Well, forgive us!!!
FATHER FROST. Snow Maiden! Shall we forgive them?
SNOW MAIDEN. Let the one who prevented us from preparing for the New Year help us!
SHURIK. Eh... no... there is no need to rush to conclusions... It is important to return full-fledged people to society...
FATHER FROST. Full-fledged means full-fledged! Snow Maiden, where do we correct kidnappers, parasites, and hooligans?
SNOW MAIDEN. On the island of Bad Luck in the ocean.
FATHER FROST. Comrade Shurik, deliver these criminals to the Island of Bad Luck! Yes! And take the infamous trinity there, inoculated against swinish behavior!
SNOW MAIDEN. Comrade Shurik, they must work for 15 days in a sand quarry, cleaning streets, and at a cement plant. For Comrade Saakhov - a separate order for the construction of a residential building under your leadership.
SHURIK. I am confident, Comrade Saakhov, that these decade and a half will pass in an atmosphere of friendship and mutual understanding. Follow me, please!
Music No. 19: “Island of Bad Luck.”
Shurik takes Saakhov and Lyolik and takes them away.
Father Frost and Snow Maiden are leaving.
SCENE 8
Music No. 2: "Market".
STORYTELLER.
This is the story that happened
In some kingdom
In a magical state
Where we lived, we didn’t grieve,
We were friends with the bunnies
Ded Moroz and Snegurochka,
Student, Komsomol member, athlete,
Finally, just a beauty!
Music No. 20: “Overture.”
Entertainers: Storyteller, Saakhov and Lyolik, Shurik, Coward, Dunce, Experienced, oriental girls, bunnies, Father Frost and Snow Maiden.
SCENE 9
Music No. 21: “New Year” (StekloVata).
Father Frost, Snow Maiden and bunnies.
FATHER FROST.
When the snow flies out of the gate
And the frost crackles all around,
He comes to every city
He comes to every home.
SNOW MAIDEN.
With colorful balls
And cheerful tinsel,
Long-awaited gifts
With noisy children's play!
Bunny.
Who's coming, who's coming?
Winter holiday New Year!
Fleeting and careless,
Endless New Year!
Bunny.
Along with skis, skates,
Round dance here and there
And sparklers
Under firecracker fireworks!
(We do fireworks.)
Bunny.
A Christmas tree comes to every home
And rosy Santa Claus!
And, looking through the crack,
We are waiting for an answer to the question!
Bunny.
Who's coming, who's coming?
Winter holiday New Year!
Fleeting and careless,
Endless New Year!
FATHER FROST.
Our holiday turned out to be a success,
Both children and adults liked it.
May you have a lot of goodness!
And it’s time for us to part with you.
Our holiday ends
Room 305 is closing.
SNOW MAIDEN.
In these moments of our farewell
To all our dear and dear friends
We are speaking:
"See you again,
Until we meet again,
We wish you happiness!”
Music No. 22: “New Year” (StekloVata).
The final performance of the artists.
Used materials
- Film comedies by L. Gaidai: “Operation “Y” and other adventures of Shurik”, “Prisoner of the Caucasus”, “The Diamond Arm”, “Ivan Vasilyevich changes his profession”.